Mercury Retrograde Mug – BeigeBot™ Therapy Edition

🪐 Mercury Retrograde Mug – BeigeBot™ Therapy Edition™

Start your morning with a mug that understands you’re doing your best—barely. Whether you’re blaming Mercury retrograde for your life choices or just trying to survive another passive-aggressive Slack thread, this glossy ceramic mug delivers cosmic sarcasm one resigned sip at a time.

“It just feels like Mercury is always in retrograde... for me.” That’s the sound of emotional honesty filtered through beige ceramic. The bot gets it. Your coworkers will too, once they see you microwaving your third cup of disappointment by 10am.

This mug is ideal for burnt-out tech workers, astrology meme hoarders, emotionally unavailable introverts, and anyone who’s quietly replaced therapy with curated podcast playlists. It’s microwave- and dishwasher-safe, printed in high resolution with fade-resistant ink, and absolutely does not come with a refund for your bad decisions. It’s also designed for right-handed drinkers, because the universe really is that petty.

Like most things in modern life, this mug doesn’t exist until you buy it. It’s printed on demand, shipped slowly, and manufactured with slightly more ethics than your last Amazon binge. Planetary alignment not included.

☕ Mug Specs:
Glossy white ceramic
11 oz (3.8″ tall, 3.2″ diameter)
Microwave + dishwasher safe
Printed on demand, shipped with minimal waste
Designed for right-hand hold (graphic faces outward)
Blank product sourced from China

This mug doesn’t exist yet.
It will, once you hit “buy.” Until then, it’s just pixels and potential.
This slows shipping but also reduces waste—unlike your last Amazon binge.